New Years Resolution

Every year people make the traditional "New Years Resolution." Within those people, only a handful of them REALLY complete their task. (Or that I know of anyway) For the past couple years I have made up my own resolution, and I have not completed one. Go figure. I don't know about you, but I feel that 2011 is going to be a better year than 2010. For 2011, I am going to finally complete my resolution...I swear. I am getting to that age that I can really put more thought into my future and do little things to help my future in some way.

Ok, I'm following the trend...I want to lose weight once and for all. I am tired of the way I look. I want to finally be able to look good and be confident enough to buy a bikini. I'm a 19 year old college freshman and I shouldn't be uncomfortable in my own body when I go out sometimes. I want to look and feel a lot better in general, boost my confidence and not be so self conscious about myself all leading to being a better daughter, girlfriend and sister. I think losing weight will help with my relationship with Brian. Honestly, we both need to lose weight. With the both of us losing weight we would be generally more content and confident. I think it would help with the fighting, also. I hate it when he eats out so much. Ugh. So many calories! I should talk, but I could lose weight, I just need to have self control when it comes to food and work harder at the gym. Its also goes for him. Damn men, why is it that they can lose weight easier than women?!? Grrrr.

Aside from losing weight, I want to cut down on my swearing, control my temper, try harder in school and think before I say things. This also kinda leads from the weight thing, but once I start getting healthier, I think this will help with my misc things like my swearing for example. Lately I've been noticing that it's really not that attractive when I swear...I sound trashy. Brian doesn't even swear that much. I have to admit, I've been getting bad since I moved out last year. Since I'm a college student, I have to really start focusing on my grades. I don't want to fall behind and I don't want to wind up not getting my degree. I really need to start trying a lot harder, darn it. 2011 is going to see a new Sarah Jahraus, just you wait :)

Last but not least, I want to be finacially stable/move out by myself or with Brian. Since corners are getting tight at my mom's house, I am getting mature enough that I can be independent and have a place of my own. Brian isn't so sure if he wants to move in now. I kinda ruined it, but sometimes I feel that I will be taking away his first year of college by moving in with me. I mean, he has bills to pay for, aside from paying for his college himself. He needs to be mature about it and stick it through. Sometimes I feel that he is just not ready to move out. I mean, we would only be dating a year in late April, I/we would move in by July or August. And we're both so young to move in together or moving in general. I know I'm ready for it, but sometimes I feel like he isn't fully. But, we will see how it goes. Take it one day at a time and keep our fingers crossed. We were first thinking about moving into my grandma's basement, then a legit apartment and now we're back to square one. The basement sounds pretty promising. It's cheap and it's a BIG space, I mean HUGE! The carpeting is outdated, but at least the kitchen, bathroom and other appliances works well. My uncle, who is the landowner of the house, hired people to paint and remodel it. It looks a lot better than before, so it works for me :) My mom is going to contact him after the holidays and probably make a deal for next summer. Excited? Yes. A little nervous? Yes. Brian moving in with me? Possibly.

Well, there ya go! I have nothing else to really talk about now, so I'll let this rest for the evening.

Happy Holidays, and have a AWESOME New Year! Maybe a few months from now I can be at least 20 lbs skinnier :)